Honduran friends

Today we finally made it to the beach for the first time and we leave Honduras in 2 days. I am not sure we will make it to the beach again before we leave which is sad. Our time is going by so fast and there is always more we want to enjoy here.

My two boys wanted some friends to come with us, particularly one boy, Louise. He lives at the Sanctuary House Children's Center near the hospital. The McKenzie family are the Scottish missionaries that are the founders and directors of the Children's Center and have some of the biggest hearts around. They are truly inspirational people. We ended up having 3 boys come with us to the beach. Angel, Ever and Louise were able to join us in walking through the sand, jumping waves, fighting over floaties, swinging on vines and lots of laughter. After we had enough sun and suspected a sunburn coming (and it did later), we began heading back and decided to invite the boys over to our place for some playing. We stopped by the house to get permission and ended up with a new threesome of boys, Manuel, Ever and Louise. I knew that Bryan was on-call for the hospital and I needed to get some food ready for our potluck dinner soon at the Thursday night Fellowship with all the missionaries. I was hoping that Bryan didn't get called in and that the 5 boys could play nicely together with little interaction from me if Bryan had to leave. I was a little concerned about taking on this endeavor of 5 boys for the afternoon but hoped that it would work out for the best. All 5 of the boys were happy to extend their time together.

Bryan did not get called in for any emergencies and the 5 boys turned into 6 + 3 grown boys. I think all the boys had fun. There were lots of snacks and jugo (juice) consumed and there was lots of running. I checked in on them once in awhile as I was preparing food and saw them playing soccer, bean bag toss, tag and some other running game with teams. They all had a blast together. Each of them helped me carry food over to the chapel. This was a new experience for at least 2 of them to get to be part of the Missionary Fellowship on Thursday night. I knew that the McKenzie family was planning to meet us there and they would take the boys home that night. Everything couldn't have went smoother. The 5+ boys even sat through singing, a short sermon and prayer time. I was very proud of them despite my 2 boys asking "How much longer?" about 100 times.

I love that Jaden and Clay always seem to make friends when we come to Honduras. In the past, the friends were usually missionary kids, but this time the friends they will remember will be Honduran. I love that they found a connection with some boys that have very different lives than we live in Minnesota.

Wonderful Easter in Honduras

 We had one of the best Easter's ever and it was in Honduras. I wasn't sure how much it would feel like Easter because of being in another country and not knowing if any traditions would still be celebrated. Things all came together at the last minute. I brought down a few toys to hide for the boys to find in their Easter baskets (bags) hiding around our temporary housing. They had a great time searching for them and eventually found them tied to a tree and buried in a bush. Then we were off to church with the missionary families. Bryan was on call in the hospital/ER and was tending to people off and on all day but was able to enjoy church with our family. They had a guest speaker who is here with a mission group from Tennessee and he told a very powerful story relating to Jesus' scars that remind us of his sacrifice for us. The missionaries have a tradition here of putting flowers on a woven cross as a symbol of the life that is found from the cross of Jesus. Everyone enjoyed doing this and seeing the beautiful transformation of the brown cross to one full of life and color.

 After church we shared a meal with our sponsor family, Rimas and Abby Miknaitis and their 2 kids. I prepared au gratin potatoes and ham and they were delicious. I will definitely be making them again in the U.S. I have a tradition of making carrot cake for Easter. I love it but eat too much of it if I make it more often. The carrot cake was an effort of love by many people. It is not easy to get all of the ingredients or items necessary to make a cake here so many people came together to make this happen. I had most of the ingredients but got cream cheese and powdered sugar from the Tumlison family. I needed additional powdered sugar which I got from the visiting Woodley family. I also didn't have a hand mixer which I borrowed from another neighbor family. I eventually found two round cake pans (with Bryan's help) after borrowing one from that neighbor. I was happy to share the cake with all of the people that helped. There was more than enough cake to go around and I think everyone enjoyed the reward for their contribution.

 

After lunch 5 of the families here had planned an Easter egg hunt for our kids. There were 10 kids and after adding up everyone's contributions we had 130 stuffed plastic eggs. This made for quite a nice egg hunt. The kids all had a blast finding eggs and enjoying the treats and toys after opening them. Then in the evening, our friends the Tumlisons invited everyone over for a bonfire. This was a nice treat because the temperature was not too hot to enjoy it. We sat around and went through the Resurrection Eggs and talked about the Easter story with the kids. There was also some singing around the fire and Jaden kept requesting more songs although he didn't know any of the words to sing along. We had an amazing day filled with fun and friends, celebrating a holiday that means so much to us.

  

daily life in Honduras

Here is our life in pictures and a little description of the common things in our lives over the last few days at Loma de Luz, near Balfate, Colon, Honduras.

Lots of time for the boys to sit and play in the hammocks. This is their favorite activity. A close second is Uno or Skip-bo card games.

 There has been lots of time for soccer with other kids.

 Much time is spent in our little apartment. Here is our family bedroom with the much requested fan. The temperatures this time have been much more mild in the mid 70's and 80's.

Here is our kitchen and dining room and main living space. You can see our small Honduran fridge. Our food in bags and containers on the counter to protect from bugs, mice and gecko poop.

 The essential bathroom in our apartment. Crosses are found here in unusual places but why not put one in the shower. It is a good place to think about the cross. More time than is wanted is spent on the toilet right now. The ever present garbage can by the toilet, required for disposal of all toilet paper. Reminds me how much I appreciate our sewer system in the U.S.

  Bryan took this amazing picture of a toucan right beside our apartment. There is lots of wildlife nearby. We have seen a few toucans this trip but have only gotten to hear the monkeys from a distance so far.

 This is one of the general living spaces which comes in very handy for some active boys. Today the soccer ball was taken away after breaking a ceiling fan and will not be returning to this room.

 We have been doing lots of walking...to the Children's Center, to the Bilingual School and even once to the pool. We have avoided the beaches nearby so far but will make a trip there soon. The beaches here get busy during Semana Santa or Holy Week before Easter. This week will be calmer at the beach and I am sure we will visit a few times.

back in Honduras

We arrived in Honduras 2 days later than our original plans but were happy to make finally make it here! We   were picked up by a van taxi driver to take us to the hospital and were pleasantly surprised by his large van and all of the space we had despite our 16 pieces of luggage. We drove through some heavy downpours. There were many flooded houses along the roadway and lots of water on the road. We weren't sure if we were going to make it to the hospital. Our driver lived in the city and at the last minute decided he didn't want to drive us all the way. We thought we might have to stay in a hotel in the nearby city (1.5 hours away from the hospital) when our host missionary, Dr. Abby, was able to work out a ride for us with another missionary family. The rain had lessened by this point and there are now bridges over all the rivers that we used to have to drive through to get to the hospital. It was quite an uneventful drive with enjoyable conversation.

Since arriving last night, Bryan got to work in the clinic today. I took a walk with the boys and visited the Children's Home and reconnected with some missionary friends. We made our first dinner meal tonight and shared it with new friends.

I am happy to be in Honduras. But I am also challenged by lots of little things...the bugs, dirt, lack of lighting, bleaching fruits and veggies, itching skin (from mosquito bites) but the majority of me is enjoying our life here. The boys are happy and playing and fighting. Just living into their normal routine with each other. I love seeing them enjoy being here. They were so excited when we arrived to the staff housing building (our hotel) that they ran inside and immediately checked out all of the common spaces. I got to enjoy their happy laughter and excitement in exploration of our new home for the next 12 days while we unpacked our bags.

Donation Blessing

I want to say a huge THANK YOU to many friends and family that donated to our Honduras trip. We are so encouraged by you and that you are choosing to put your money toward something that we care deeply about. Bryan and I have been talking and praying about what we should do with all of the donation money. In the past we have used it to cover our expenses for airfare, housing and food and used some of it to bless the missionaries and hospital with requested items. This time around we really want the money to go to Loma de Luz (the place where we serve) and meet a larger request for them. We are not sure what that larger item(s) will be yet. One idea is to purchase a refrigerator for staff housing and temporary guest housing. Here is the short list of requested items that are in consideration for purchasing while we are in Honduras.
     - medium sized chest freezer for storing chicken & goat meat raised at the farm, 15-20 cu. ft.
     - 2 dorm size fridges
     - 5 new or newer refrigerators
     - 2 new or newer stoves/ovens

If you are interested in donating to a great cause and supporting the work we do alongside many other missionaries, you can go here to donate to us through World Medical Mission/Samaritan's Purse. You need to enter "Jarabek" in the text box labeled Find Dr/Medical Professional. We will be notified of your donation and add it to the group purchase. Thank you so much for your support!

If you want to see more of Loma de Luz, here are 3 of the best videos:
Loma de Luz with the founder, created by Samaritan's Purse
Children's Center
Loma de Luz Hospital with a few of the missionaries

Minneapolis layover to Honduras

We should be on our way in an airplane to Honduras right now, but instead we are having a "layover" in our house. We got somewhere between 4 and 6 hours of sleep last night to leave our house at 3am this morning. We headed to the airport for a 5:15am flight to Houston and then were to catch our connecting flight to San Pedro Sula, Honduras. All the details were set. We had a ride from the airport to Hospital Loma de Luz and our groceries were being purchased today. All of that changed at around 3:50am when we were at the computer kiosk to check-in to our flight. A United airlines agent helped scan our passports and a warning came up when Clay's passport was scanned in the computer. Travel not permitted for Clay Jarabek. Ugh! Enter sinking feeling in gut. What did we do? What did we miss?

The agent kindly explained that Clay's passport was about to expire...in 87 days and he can not travel to Honduras unless he has 90 days until his passport expires. My first reaction was that Bryan and Jaden should just go and Clay and I can get this fixed and meet them there to save us some money. Then Bryan responded that we will all go together. It is safer that way. Clay burst into tears. He thought we may leave him. I comforted him. Bryan got a little upset but was still relatively calm for the average person. He talked and investigated and talked some more. Was there any way to fix this or get around this? No. We would have to get his passport extended or get a new passport for him and rebook our tickets.

We worked with 2 kind-hearted, gracious ticket agents at United airlines. They were calm when Bryan did not want to be calm. They understood what we were going to do in Honduras and that we were carrying a lot medical supplies with us. One agent kept referring to Bryan as "doctor." The other agent willingly rebooked our tickets and did not charge us change fees or the additional cost of the new flight times! We believe God is always with us and sometimes He works things out to make our lives easier.

Today we will be watching more college basketball and trying to enjoy our somewhat relaxing day. The boys are enjoying some additional computer time today. Clay will be getting new passport photos today too. So our new plans include a trip to to the passport office in Minneapolis on Monday morning. Too bad they are closed on Sundays but at least this does not require a trip to Chicago any more. Then we are off to Houston on Monday afternoon. We will stay in a hotel near the airport and then will be on our way to Honduras on Tuesday morning, March 26th. Everything for us in Honduras will start 2 days later than planned but we are still going and I'm sure it will still be an unforgettable trip.

My arms have gotten quite the workout in the last 8 hours. I hauled all of our bags inside the airport (with some help from 2 amazing boys) while Bryan parked our car. Then we moved them back out to our car as we left the airport. Here is our total luggage count...not a record but still quite a load: 1 large suitcase with items for our family and missionaries, 7 large luggage bags (6 with medical supplies and 1 with toys for the foster kids at the Children's Center), 4 carry-on suitcases (with our clothes) and 4 backpacks (with education and entertainment). All of that got loaded back into our Mazda 5. And, yes, Bryan has all the seats moved as far forward as possible. Still amazing that we all fit in there with our luggage. This picture is missing the backpacks on our laps.

supplies for Honduras

Here is a little more information about our upcoming trip to Honduras and how you can help us fill our suitcases.

This picture was taken of our family on our last trip to Honduras in May 2011. This is one of the many interesting ways that we get from place to place in Honduras.

We are returning to Honduras in a few short weeks! Our family of 4 will be serving there in a variety of ways. Dr. Bryan (as he is called there) will be serving in the clinic and hospital. I will be helping with some projects on their computers with the IT missionary. The boys and I are planning to help in the eye clinic and be at the Children's Center (group home for foster care) as much as possible.

We are filling as many suitcases as possible with donated medical supplies and other requested items to take with us on our trip. If you would like to help us fill our bags, we would be happy to take donations of any of the items listed below. Please try to get the items to us by March 20th so we can get everything packed. If you would rather have us purchase the requested items with your monetary donation, we would be happy to do that too. You can donate to us through Samaritan's Purse if you would like a tax deductible receipt or give the money directly to us. Here is the donation website:http://www.samaritanspurse.org/medical/wmm-doctors/ and you will need to scroll down and enter Jarabek in the little search box and an old picture of our family will show up.

Thank you for wanting to partner with us in this adventure as we continue to use the gifts and skills God has given us. We would love it if you would remember us in prayer while we are in Honduras. We leave Sunday, March 24th and return Sunday, April 7th for our two week mission trip with our two boys: Jaden (8) and Clay (6).

If you are ever interested in going to Honduras with us, please let us know. There are a multitude of things you could do there to help. There truly is something for everyone and your skills will be put to use. You can read more about where we go in Honduras at http://www.crstone.org/

Thank you,

Raquel (& Bryan) Jarabek

Requested Items:
- White washcloths
- Claritin/Loratadine (4 bottles wanted) – 10mg, 365 tablets for $12.99 at Costco (best price)
- Allegra/Fexofenadine (2 bottles) – 180 mg, 120 tablets for $30.99 at Costco (best price)
- Bandaids – kids or adult
- Antibiotic ointment or bacitracin
- Children’s Tylenol/Acetaminophen
- Children’s Advil/Ibuprofen
- Children’s Benedryl/Diphenhydramine HCl
- Children's cough medicines
- Swimsuits for 2-3 year old girls and floaties for them
- Bob Books (any sets)
- Big Books for guided reading in Kindergarten and First Grade
- Battery operated pencil sharpener
- Washable paint and paint cups
- Stickers
- White card stock paper
- Washable stamp pads
- Small towels for everyday cleaning of the school
- Rubber balls for recess playtime- New or gently used knee or ankle braces
- New or gently used prescription glasses
- New or gently used reading glasses (1.75 is needed most)
- Children’s or Adult sunglasses
- Travel size toothpaste
- Zinc oxide ointment (Balmex or similar)
- Cetaphil lotion and cream (or generic), Lubriderm, etc
- Adult: Benadryl/Diphenhydramine/Calamine (topical liquid preferred)
- Adult: Combo of antihistamine/decongestant
- Adult: Combo of antihistamine/decongestant/dextromethorphan
- Adult: Cough medicines like Dextromethorphan or Guafenisin (preferably not combined)
- Foam hand sanitizer
- Hot water bottles
- Adult scissors, all types
- Physical Therapy equipment: 1, 2, & 3 lb weights, floor mats, pulleys, resistance bands, wedges for elevating extremities

Honduras, here we come, again!

We leave for Honduras in 5 short weeks! After taking a year off from our travel there while doing foster care, we are excited to be going there to help again. Bryan will be using his doctor skills in the clinic and hospital at Loma de Luz and I will be using any skills I can to take care of our two boys and help in any way possible. I will probably help in the eye clinic, on the computer, with a feeding program and hangout with kids at the Children's Center (for foster care). The boys will tag along and help whenever they are able.

This is our fourth trip to Honduras and we are so gratified that we can serve God and others in this way. We are leaving on March 24th and will return April 7th after a two week adventure in the countryside. There are many challenges that come with living in Honduras and I look forward to sharing those with anyone who will read or listen. We love that we have friends and family who care about us and what we are doing. Thank you for your care and concern.

Each time we have traveled to Honduras, we have given friends and family the opportunity to join us on our adventure. Some family members have joined us in serving in Honduras, while many others have supported us with prayer and finances. We are again giving you the opportunity to partner with us in the work that we do in Honduras. Please let us know if you are interested in traveling with us on a future trip. As for this trip, we would greatly appreciate your prayers for safety, usefulness, flexibility and pointing people to God, who is the reason that we do this. If you would like to give to us financially, we thank you so much for caring to invest in us. You can do that by going to Samaritan's Purse and typing Jarabek in the text box. You will see Bryan's name pop up and an old picture of our family taken before our first trip to Honduras in 2008. Our boys are much older now, Jaden is 8 and Clay is 6. We really do consider you a partner in our trip and our work in Honduras if you are reading this. We appreciate your prayers and financial gifts. They help us serve others.

100% of your financial donations will get passed on to our family for our trip. That money will be used for a variety of things but here is some idea of what you are helping make happen. We will be taking 6 large bags/suitcases with us that are full of medical supplies. We get most of the items donated but there are always some very useful things that we like to purchase to help the clinic/hospital. Your money will allow us to purchase those medical items. We will also be taking 1 large bag/suitcase with toys and clothing for children at the foster care center. Your contribution will allow us to purchase some of those items needed for the care of those children. We also have baggage fees in order to take all of these donations with us. Half of our bags will be free but we plan to have to pay about $160 for checked baggage. Your donation may also go to purchase supplies for a feeding program for impoverished children who live at the city dump.

Thank you so much for your donations. We will definitely put you money to good use. Know that you are a partner in all that we do in Honduras whether you are praying or giving or reading. Thank you. I look forward to writing more about our preparations and our trip.

foster child update

It has been one year since we had our first foster child come into our house. Almost 4 year old, Alexis, arrived to our house on 10/24/11. One year ago we were taking three children trick-or-treating. Life was crazy and we had big hopes that it would get less crazy. We lived in extreme stress for 6 months with Alexis and had to let her move on to another family about 6 months ago. Our family has recovered for the most part but we will never be the same people we were before doing foster care.

Alexis is now with a great family that is in the process of adopting her and her story in foster care has a great ending. God really did provide when we needed him to. He brought amazing parents, without other kids, and with the skills and love that Alexis needed. On top of that, the new family wants us involved in their lives. We had hoped and prayed that we would be able to keep up with Alexis. We love that little girl and hope that we can somehow overcome the difficulties and be her friends for life. The new parents are hoping that our continuing relationship also helps Alexis understand that she is still loved by us even though our relationship is different now.

Since Alexis left at the end of April, we have seen her a few times but the times together usually don't end well. She has fun with us for awhile and then something happens and memories are probably triggered and her behavior worsens.

About 2 months ago, I met with the new mom and Alexis for lunch and I enjoyed it but it was also difficult. The boys and Bryan haven't seen her in about 4 months but we were hoping for a short trick-or-treating visit at their house tonight. It was all setup to happen but it just got canceled. Alexis is having a really hard time right now trusting that her new parents won't leave her and that they love her. She asks them a lot and she cries a lot. She cries when life is hard and anything can bring out the tears. Not sure if she is remembering where she was a year ago but something has triggered this as a harder time for her.

It breaks my heart that she is having a harder time than usual time right now. I had been looking forward to seeing her tonight. I know that we helped Alexis get through some tough times in the past but I still have lots of negative thoughts creep in about what damaging things we did to her by not adopting her. I know it was for the best for her and for us but it still has some negative results attached to it.

I am happy to go trick-or-treating with my two little super heroes, Jaden and Clay (who chose to wear their same costumes this year), but I will also be thinking about what life was like one year ago. Alexis will always be in my prayers.

marriage is worth the effort

Bryan and I recently got back from an 8 night trip to the Big Island, Hawaii, Hawaii! It was the trip of a lifetime! We left the boys in Fargo, ND with their grandparents and other family members and we had 11 days without them! That was the longest we have ever left them. I missed them more than I expected. It was so great to be reunited with them.

We decided to take a big trip over our anniversary this year because we knew we needed to do something special to boost our marriage and continue the recuperation from foster care. We celebrated our 14th anniversary on August 1st. We hadn't initially planned to do something big for year 14 but after everything we have been through in the last year, we knew we needed it. We talked about going many different places but in the end, we chose Hawaii. This was Bryan's year to plan the excursion since we take turns every other year. (Next year I get to plan a trip to London for our 15th anniversary, which has been the hope for many years.) Bryan planned an amazing trip to Hawaii filled with lots of snorkeling and volcanoes, along with some great places to stay. We did a lot on this trip but it was a long trip so it didn't seem too filled up.

We started out the trip exploring some beaches, swimming/snorkeling with sea turtles and watching the manta rays at night. We took a helicopter ride (checked off of my life goal list) over an active volcano, Kilauea, and got to see lots of red, hot lava. We did some hiking and driving around volcanoes. We explored the rainforest and saw many waterfalls. We played on black sand beaches and hiked to a green sand beach. We spent time relaxing on white sand beaches, surrounded by lava rock. We saw more lava rock than we thought possible. We also took a tour up Mauna Kea (inactive volcano) for a beautiful view of the sunset surrounded by gigantic telescopes. While there we enjoyed staring at the stars in the clear sky and high elevation (14,000 ft) and looking through an 11" telescope at some things we had never seen before in the night sky. We also included some local shopping and a snorkel/boat trip on our trip. It truly was an amazing trip!

Bryan and I have returned refreshed and loving life. There is no doubt that this boosted our marriage and made it better. This trip was not easy, especially for Bryan who did the planning, and it wasn't cheap. We invested a lot of time and money into this trip but it was all to make our marriage better. Our investment is paying off. We are huge proponents of taking time away from your kids to keep your marriage heading in the right direction.

After this trip, we are even more convinced that our marriage is worth investing in to make it better. Our marriage is great but it has also been a lot of work. We have been working at it for 14 years. We have learned that if we keep working at our marriage to improve it, then it won't go bad. We want to keep things moving in the right direction...to greater love, intimacy and commitment and further away from separation and divorce. There have been times when we haven't put the effort into our marriage and it showed. We both are fully aware that marriage isn't easy. It is not easy to stay in love and keep the romance alive. A great marriage takes effort and it is so worth it! Take some time...be creative...add a little spark back into your marriage!

healing from foster care

I have so many mixed emotions about foster care and adoption and that has been keeping me from writing about it. I knew that it had been awhile since I last blogged about anything related to foster care but when I looked today at my blog I realized that I haven't written anything since 2 days after our little foster girl left (about 8 weeks ago).

Our family life is drastically different now. There are only four people in our house and we are able to relax. Our bodies and minds are recovering from living in extreme stress for six months. The boys behavior is getting back to a healthy state but there is always room for improvement. We still see some lasting behavior that developed during foster care but that will change with more time. The first week with the two boys was very difficult still dealing with their recently developed behavior challenges but since that week, things have steadily improved. We have now been a family of four for 8 weeks and it stills seems to soon to be healed. We are still processing everything.

Our family has been healing and I am sure the healing will continue. We accomplished something big by taking another child into our home and a difficult child at that. I thank God that He was with us throughout everything and that increased our prayer time. But I also know that we didn't succeed at adopting a child. I have a life goal list and on that list are many things including foster a child and adopt a child. We accomplished one but the other did not happen. Some may call it a failed adoption. I know there are some that are thinking that. I also know that God is bringing more good out of this than I thought possible. So I am going to keep praying that God will continue to bring more good out of this difficult situation.

I am not sure what lies ahead for our family. There are times we think that this (foster care or having 3 kids) just isn't our ministry and God has gifted us with other talents. Now we can shift our focus to pursuing other things we are passionate about. But there are other times that I think maybe these 3 kids weren't our ministry and that this just wasn't our time. I can't say that we will never foster a child again or that we will never adopt a child. I don't know what is in our future. I know that we will not intentionally be changing our family size any time soon and we will not be doing foster care any time soon. Our family needs more time to heal and our boys need some more stability. I see that more now than ever.

SpaceX launch

Exciting news today that SpaceX launched their Dragon capsule in the hopes to dock with the International Space Station. I am keeping a close eye on this for a couple reasons. I like knowing current events related to NASA. I also have particular interest in following anything happening at the International Space Station because I am helping with the development of an exhibition about the station at the Science Museum of Minnesota. I can't wait to hear about how the docking of Dragon goes on Friday. Hoping everything is successful and then the US will again be able to launch our own cargo to the space station.

Here is an article at Universe Today if you want to read more about it. Picture credit: Ken Kremer.

mischievous nephew

We are taking care of my two nephews for one evening while my sister and her husband get away. They are visiting us from Germany and a hotel without kids is a nice treat in Minneapolis. So we have four boys in our house. Things have gone rather smoothly. We walked a trail through the forest. Dinner and playland at McDonald's. Playtime and movie at home. Then this morning while I was showering and Bryan had the four boys, the thing I thought most likely to happen with a foster child happened with my nephew. A computer was destroyed.

Bryan left our nephew in the living room by himself with a task. He was wiping furniture and cleaning and enjoying it. Bryan was in the basement with the three big boys for maybe 5-10 minutes when he came up to find a disaster. He found his laptop that was put away, taken out and almost all of the keys and plastic connectors pulled off with blood on the computer keys and carpet from my nephew's little 2 year old fingers. We went to wash his hands and discovered the toilet filled with toilet paper with toilet water everywhere. My oh my did that kid have a fun time in those few minutes. We already knew that any kid in our house would know that the computers are our most prized posessions and my nephew probably also knew that from his house. We had been told to watch out for foster kids destroying what is most important to you. I didn't expect this from my cute nephew.

This nephew is such a little sweetheart and has been loved on a lot by us the last few days. He will never forget this story and Bryan may really need a new computer. God continues to remind us that people are more important than things. My sister does not have an easy job raising her little Curious George.

transitioning out of foster care

On Sunday I packed up the last of our little foster girl's stuff at our house. Everything was ready to be moved to her new home and new foster/adopt family. The boys and I said goodbye and see ya later while Bryan was at work. I was handling things pretty well. Saturday and Sunday were hard days because of dealing with 3 kids with behavior issues while Bryan was working. So in some ways it was a relief to say goodbye to one child. I knew the hardness of that would still hit me. Our family went to church Sunday evening and the emotion of it all hit me. I am still dealing with feelings of failure in what we hoped would end in adoption. There are feelings of sadness from all of us that we will miss this little girl. We are hopeful and excited about her new life. We also feel like celebrating our freedom. We have felt more confined to our house with three kids and their behavior issues. So we have mixed feelings of sadness and celebration, disappointment and hopefulness.

Monday night we got to see the new family of 3 for dinner as all 7 of us ate together. This was planned because Bryan missed out on the joint goodbye on Sunday and it was nice to have another thing to look forward to. At dinner we were reminded that little girl is still in a state of stress. She was overly loud and doesn't fully understand that she has left our house permanently. I am sure this will take some time to set in for her. We were also reminded that our attention is now focused off of this little girl and onto our two boys. The boys behavior needs to improve and get back to a healthy place. Neither of them ever had tantrums before this little girl entered our house and now at 5 and 7 years old, they are both having major emotional and physical breakdowns. We know our boys are resilient but they need a lot of love and attention right now. We are happy to provide that for them. I am amazed at how much quieter our house and cars are when there are only 2 kids instead of 3. I am enjoying the quietness and working through all that we have experienced in the last 6 months of foster care. Thank you again for your prayers and thoughts. We appreciate them.